Today's Funny

Ok, so it might not actually be today's funny.  But today is the day I will tell you about it, so that does make it today's funny. 

I was at Starbucks a couple days ago, pretending to be the typical NoVa yuppie-spoiled-wannabe-trophy wife.  I, clearly, am not ... any of the above.  I am, however, a Starbucks drinker—a fact that spawned today's funny.

I went into a Starbucks after I had tanned.  I was looking to drink a yummy drink while perusing an academic book while waiting to see an Oscar-nominated movie.  As I was waiting for my yuppie (and yummy) drink, a band of cops came in.  Seriously ... there were, like, eight of them.  And as I was standing at the receiving table, one of the aforementioned cops came over, motioned to my arm, and said, "what do you have?"

I assumed he was talking about what I'd ordered, which I'd not yet received.  So I said, "I'm sorry, what?"

And then he pointed (VERY NOTABLY) to my Medic Alert bracelet.  And goes, "NO.  What do you HAVE?!?"

I answer, "Um, seizures."

He nods and goes, "Well, have a good day."

I go, "umm ... okay?"

Then I got my drink and walked away.

Seriously.  How was I supposed to respond to that?  Was I supposed to thank him for noticing that I have a Medic Alert bracelet?  Or was I supposed to pretend it didn't happen?  After all, it is a first responder's job to notice such things (a Medic Alert bracelet, and all).  But did he really need to comment on it?  I wasn't seizing at the moment.  I mean, I know I'm fairly new at this and all, but is there an appropriate way to respond to someone who asks about the bracelet?  Is there a standard way to end that conversation?

It's kind of like when people tell you that your hair's gotten longer.  How do you respond to that?  Do you say "thank you?"  Or do you just go, "umm, yeah," since commenting on a person's hair length isn't really a compliment (unless they say it looks really good longer, which is kind of a backhanded compliment because it implies that your hair didn't look good when it was shorter).

Honestly, I don't think there are any graceful ways to exit these awkward conversations or to respond to comments like these.  I think we should have more of a "don't ask, don't tell" policy for things like hair length and Medic Alert bracelets.  Or rather, a "don't comment on that" policy.

If, however, you feel that you must ask me "what I have," then at least wish me good luck with that as I walk away.  Then I could at least thank you.  Otherwise, I just have to stare at you like you have two heads and say, "ok, I'm gonna go over there now.  Buh bye."