Sugar, sugar

There are a lot of things that I've come to miss since moving to DC last year.  Things that I always took for granted growing up in the South and just assumed would be a part of regular life anywhere in the country.  You know—things like chivalry, good churches, people who actually know how to drive ....

But there's one thing that I really miss, especially since the summer began:  sweet tea.

And I have to ask—why don't people drink it here???

I mean, I might—and I emphasize might here—understand if I lived in, say, Boston or even New York.  Somewhere well above the Mason-Dixon line.  But I live in DC.  Technically, I live in Northern Virginia, which makes sweet tea's absence even more upsetting.  I mean, I'm south of the Mason-Dixon line, and I reside in the state that was home to Robert E. Lee.  Why don't they serve sweet tea???

It's not like I haven't tried to get it here.  Really.  When I'm out at a restaurant, I ask—with my most charming Southern smile—for sweet tea.  But invariably, I'm met with a) a look I'd expect to receive if I'd just asked my waiter/waitress to bring me some crack as a side to my salad, b) a look of earnest surprise, or c) a look I might get if I'd just ordered my meal in Farsi.

It started out as a blip.  I ordered sweet tea at lunch one day.  It was in the 90s outside, I'd been doing the tourist thing and was hot, and I wanted some ice cold sweet tea.  I could barely wait.

And then my waiter said those dreaded words: "Oh, well, we actually have unsweetened tea.  Is that okay?"

No, it was decidedly not okay.  Why would I (or anyone else for that matter) want unsweetened tea?  I changed my order to a water with lemon.  Strike one.

A couple weeks later, I was again out to lunch and again tried to order a sweet tea.  But this time I asked first (which any good Southerner knows is completely unnecessary in the Southland).  And again, the answer was no.  They had "regular" tea, as well as a variety of fruit teas and some other thing that did not sound appealing at all.  Disappointedly, I ordered the raspberry tea, which I have to admit was pretty delicious—I highly recommend the raspberry tea at Matchbox.  But it still wasn't sweet tea.  Strike two.

I was discouraged—understandably so—but still hadn't given up.  I tried one more time, this time at dinner a few days later.  I had high hopes, remembering that the third time's the charm.  But not this time.  Once again, the restaurant didn't have sweet tea!  Although the waitress helpfully pointed out that I could get "regular" tea and then add synthetic sweeteners to it.  Why on earth would I want to do that?  Synthetic sweeteners don't dissolve in iced tea!  So why would I want to drink grainy semi-sweet tea?  Yuck!  This was strike three.  I had most definitely struck out.

Am I the only person in the District of Columbia that wants to drink sweetened ice tea?  Maybe I am.  I mean, why else wouldn't restaurants serve sweet tea?  It's not like the recipe for sweet tea is rocket science:  Step 1 - brew tea; Step 2 - pour a bunch of sugar into it; Step 3 - serve over ice.  Viola!  You magically have sweet tea!

Luckily, I won't be deprived of sweet tea for the entire summer.  I'm waiting with bated breath until next week when I return to Atlanta for a few days.  You'd better believe that I will be drinking more than my fair share of sweet tea during my stay, but I'm still a little distressed as to what I should do when I come back up North.  Maybe I should start a petition to bring sweet tea into the District.  Is anyone with me???